14 day Master Cleanse Finale!

(leftover Zest, sun-kissed & dried)

ddddaaaayyyy 14 !

Today has been SOUR AS FUCKKK, wow. A lot of emotions, man. Crazy when you don’t have food to numb the pain, you realize just how PAINFUL pain actually is!

I’ve got like the craziest headache right now, after about an hour of screaming and crying like a 2 year old. About adult stuff though. No, no. About built-up and harbored resentment from childhood finally fully realized and resurfaced in the present-tense, as an “Adult”. Boy, my Saturn Return sure is kickin’ in, huh.

ANYWAY! Day Fourteen! Catorce! Vierzhen! WahoOoOoO! I did it!

I survived 14 whole days with nothing but the consumption of the mighty Master Cleanse! Lemons, maple syrup and cayenne pepper! And water, of course. Wow. I feel very accomplished! Especially since I haven’t committed to something and carried it out fully since that 21 day water fast in December. I can’t go too long without a new challenge.

How am I feeling?!?! Let’s see… I feel SO GREAT NOW! I came into this feeling pretty shitty. Not only feeling but looking really shitty too, let’s be honest. Like I told you, my hair and skin were all cracked, peeling and dry. I had blotchiness and blemishes all over my face. Not at my heaviest, but pretty close, maybe like 160lbs. I had lots of mucous, body aches upon waking, really fatigued, bloated and puffy all over, the list goes on and on and ON.

Today I feel AMAZING.

Let me make this simple and share with you a bullet list of counter-occurrences!

  • My face is glowing. Skin is clearer, looks almost airbrushed. No sign of impurities besides maybe some open pores and dark spots/scars from picking pimples.
  • The elasticity in my face has improved and I look like my young Self again! Before starting the MC I was literally looking AGED! ..which is so sad considering everyone always thinks I’m no older than 20 (I’m about to hit 29)
  • My cheeks look a nice healthy, rosy-pink color. I’m no longer pale nor do I look tired and run-down. My dark circles have vanished!
  • My nails are definitely stronger even though their non-existent. I can totally tell because they’re harder to chew (suffered a really bad nail-biting relapse, now I can’t stop.. this was 100% external stress-induced)
  • Hair is softer and back to curly and bouncy and lovely ;] It’s also really shiny!
  • Tongue is still coated white (due to detox) but A LOT LESS than day 1!
  • No more mucous or sinus annoyance.
  • My weight has gone down a bit. Overall I lost maybe like 15lbs or something?
  • Face slimmed out, cheekbones are kinda back, no more double chin!
  • All around de-bloated and super rehydrated!
  • Heels have healed! No more cracked, dried, dying, decrepit feet! Hallelujah.
  • I feel so light and flexible.
  • No more aches or joint pain upon waking.

Yayy!!!! To all that! =D

Honestly, I felt so strong (physically/mentally) and satiated on the Master Cleanse, I could have continued with it for another 2 weeks, but my taste buds were bored. I broke it a couple of hours ago with ripe, in-season, reddish-pink, juicy, sweet, WATERMELON! Ohhh my GOD. That first bite was E V E R Y T H I N G, WOAH. I thoroughly enjoyed myself this morning with the fresh, crisp taste of that delicious water-rich fruit. Jesus Christ. Sinking my teeth into that first bite was all it took to remind me why Watermelon is my absolute favorite fruit in the world! Ahhh man.

I’ll probably continue mono-mealing on Watermelon for the rest of this month, perhaps even July and August as well. I figure it’s in season, good quality, and relatively cheap! I can get a watermelon for less than 5 bucks on a good sale day and last time I did Watermelon Island (37 days on just watermelon), I only ate 1-2 a day! That’s what, 5 bucks a day in food?! $140 in food costs for the month. HAAHAHAH That’s the perfect poor woman’s diet. Except I’ll be rich AF because like the saying goes, “Your wealth is in your f*%$king health!” That’s the saying, right?

YAY! So yes! 2 WEEKS of no solids and simply drinking the spicy, sweet, and citrusy concoction of lemons, maple syrup and cayenne pepper! And I’m alive! In fact, ALIVER than ever! It can be done! I feel so empowered! This was such a well-deserved/needed digestive rest for my body and mind. Thank the Universe for helping me get back on track (I was slippin’ big time). I’m so excited to continue cleansing with fruit during the summer and improve my health even more!

I’m leaving Arizona tomorrow and headed to the festival. I’m super stoked to unwind and party! After that, making my way to NY so by this time next week, I’ll be back in Brooklyn! I imagine that’s going to feel verrry different. I’ve learned so much about myself being away from home and I feel a lot of changes occurring internally. I know this means external changes are afoot and I couldn’t be more enthuseddd!



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